What my psychologist taught me

Put boundaries in place
On my journey to mental health and bipolar management, I have been fortunate enough to be in the care of the most incredible psychologist. He has taught me many  lessons and life skills that have enabled me to live a more stable and manageable life. (I’m still working on the joy bit though).


I would like to share these with you in the hope that at least one of these lessons may resonate with you and empower you; –

  • Set boundaries.
    • Think about your stresses, pin-point the reason.
    • Set boundaries to keep the stress out. Stick to your boundaries.
    • Don’t waiver or even negotiate.
    • It will be difficult at first, but if you follow through you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how your stress levels decline.S
    • Start small and as you gain confidence, go bigger.
    • The more you stand firm the easier it becomes.
Little pleasures
  • Plan breathers and adventures.
    • Draw up a list of things you enjoy doing.
    • These don’t have to be extravagant, simple pleasures work well.
    • Commit to them mentally and make a visible calendar .
    • When the day arrives don’t find excuses to opt out.
    • Go even if you really don’t feel like going.
    • Simple pleasures improve your mood considerably.
    • Any improvement is a step in the right direction.
Create a bubble
  • Create a bubble.
    • This concept is particularly useful for stigmas, mental health issues and criticism
    • We all know that any one of these can trigger a devastating chain reaction.
    • So protect yourself.
    • Create a bubble around yourself and visual this. Practice this.
    • This is your safe place.
  • Create a mantra.
    • Put in place a mantra that you can easily memorise.
    • “I hear everything, I see everything, but this doesn’t affect me.”
    • Repeat this mantra over and over again
    • In negative situation automatically put your protection plan in place.
    • I know this may sound like a silly thing to do but it works really well.
Plan ahead
  • Plan ahead.
    • When  you are feeling good, get stuck in and do as much as you can.
    • Plan, organise, work in advance and get ahead of your schedule.
    • This way when ‘trouble strikes’ you have less to worry about.
  • Inform people around you.
    • Educate. Educate. Educate.
    • Tell the people who you trust the most what your triggers are
    • Tell them what happens when you are in a bad place.
    • Most importantly tell them what you would like them to do.
    • Chances are they will be at a loss a to how to handle the situation.
    • Because they don’t know what to do, they’ll probably do the wrong thing.
    • This will make thing worse of you.
Emotional vulnerability
  • Don’t do things that make you emotionally vulnerable. 
    • Eliminate those things that generally trigger an emotional reaction.
    • For me sadness can take hold of me and hang on until I hit rock bottom.
    • I avoid sad or emotional movies.
    • I don’t listen to music that brings back unpleasant or melancholy memories.
    • As soon as I start feeling sad I delve into my little ‘stash of happiness’.
    • I walk around my garden, I play my piano.
    • I go for tea or coffee with someone whose company I enjoy.
    • I watch a movie that I know makes me laugh.
  • Rid yourself of anyone toxic.
    • We all know this. Just do it.
    • Do it and don’t feel guilty.
    • Emotional vampires literally suck the life out of you. Get rid of them.
    • Don’t rekindle the relationship for any reason whatsoever.
    • This is an important steps you can take in your journey to wellness.
  • Finally, be kind to yourself.
    • Practise gratitude.
    • Be kind to those around you.
    • Be compassionate.
    • Don’t subject others to your negative thoughts.
    • Allow yourself to feel emotions but put a time limit in place.


I am focussing on putting this action plan in place by taking one step at a time. I wish you well in your journey.

“The highest form of wisdom is kindness.” – The Talmud






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